


Heart and Soul

by VerdiWithin



Series: Talisman [7]
Category: Lore Olympus (Webcomic)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2019-10-13
Packaged: 2020-12-14 16:50:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21019055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VerdiWithin/pseuds/VerdiWithin
Summary: Psyche is adapting to life in Olympus.





	Heart and Soul

**Author's Note:**

> This story directly follows Not Fire Nor Stars, which is Talisman #5.
> 
> Previously in this series: Hades broke up with Minthe. Persephone comforted him, told him a story, and loaned him her good-luck charm. Persephone realized that child shades don't have the same chance at an afterlife that regular shades do, and proposed a new policy for rebirth. As part of his plan to get Psyche back, Eros is trying to start a business as a personal stylist. Persephone pitched her plan for Elysium to the Underworld executives, and visited the future site with Hades. Hades told Eros that his mother's nymph assistant is actually Psyche. Persephone continues work on Elysium. Persephone and Hades went out to lunch together, but were interrupted by an angry Minthe.

When I was very little, they tell me, I was raucous and wild. Forever singing and shouting, leaping and climbing. I was the youngest, and my father was amused, so I was indulged. When I got a little bigger, I remember, I constantly tried to follow my father and his men when they went out. I wanted to ride horses, to tell jokes, to hunt, to see the world beyond the walls of home. My father just laughed.

My mother did not. I remember her, and my sisters, with their stern disapproving eyes. “Those things are for boys, Psyche,” they said. “Not for you.”

So instead I learned to spin, and weave, and sew. I learned embroidery, drawing, and painting. I learned to dance and sing as befits a maiden, with modesty and grace. I learned to be charming, for they told me that my purpose was to be a wife, and for that I must first catch a husband. I listened to the stories I was told, I watched the women around me, and I tried to be the girl they wanted me to be.

There were serving girls in my father’s palace, always giggling together in corners. I was rarely allowed to spend much time with them, but I snuck away when I could. Their stories were all of young men, handsome heroes who existed solely to be pleasing to the eye and to rescue young women from some undefined danger. Once the rescue was accomplished, the young hero invariably declared his undying love for the maiden, and they were married at once. I thought,  _ Well, that would not be so bad.  _ That was what love is supposed to be, the girls said. 

My sisters laughed when I repeated the stories to them. “It is not like that,” they said. “Father will pick out a man that he wants to be allied with, and you will marry him. Just like we did.” My sisters seemed happy enough. Their husbands were rich, and spoke gently, and they were certainly generous. I supposed if that was what my future held, I could learn to tolerate it as I had learned to tolerate other things. I would learn to love my husband, my sisters said. 

But when Love came for me, it was not like that at all.

***

When Aphrodite brought me into her home, there was one rule. “You will never reveal your identity in any way to anyone, especially to Eros.” She explained to me, slowly, as if to a child, why this would be. “We are going to test him. We are going to find out if he really does love you, and we are going to do that by watching him carefully. You look like a young and pretty nymph, and you are going to live with my family. We will see whether he chases you, or he pines for you.”

She terrified me, so I obeyed. Also, in truth, it meant I could see Eros again, even if could not touch him or really even converse with him. I did not understand then how awful it would be to be near him and have him look right through me. He saw the nymph that I could see in the mirror, and he did not care about her. I told myself that was a good thing, that he only wanted me as I had been, but it was no consolation. I wanted him and I could not stop wanting him.

I asked Aphrodite, “How long must this test go on? Has he not proven himself yet?”

“No,” she laughed. “Not yet, child. Have patience.”

So I did as Aphrodite bid me. I minded her children and sometimes I cooked or cleaned. These were familiar tasks. But there was no spinning or sewing, and I need only embroider if I wanted to. Some days Aphrodite would send me out, with money and instructions on what to do with it. I had never handled money, nor been outside all alone. At first I was afraid. What if someone tried to steal me away? But I suppose that sort of thing only happens once in a girl's life.

In time I became more confident, going anywhere Aphrodite wished, speaking to strangers, buying things. Olympus was beautiful beyond any dream, and I had time to explore. Aphrodite was generous that way. She would tell me, "You have done enough for today, go enjoy yourself." At first I would only sit outside and draw, but Aphrodite laughed when I told her this. The next time, she gave me some money and said I was to spend it on myself. "Buy yourself a coffee, and maybe some art supplies." I did as she said. In my life before, I never imagined a place like this.

In Olympus I can go wherever I please. I can explore, and climb, and speak to anyone. I can draw anything I like, as often as I like, and I need never spin, neither wool nor flax. I can buy books and read them. I could write a book if I wanted! Maybe I will.

Still, I cannot do what I most want. I promised Aphrodite. When I first met her, I was so frightened. I had lost Eros and I thought he would never come back. When she came instead, I was afraid, but I was relieved, too. I hoped she would kill me. I did not realize how much worse it would be that she let me live. Every day I see him, I am close to him, and he ignores me. Is this how he normally is? Was he only kind to me before in order to get what he wanted? That is what my sisters believed. I cannot believe that. Their advice robbed me of everything I loved.

***

Most days I spent with Aphrodite, out and about, doing the business of being the goddess of love and beauty. Sometimes that meant going around Olympus, talking to people, attending parties, sitting in public places and receiving admiration. This seemed very strange to me, so different from what I was taught to be the proper sphere of women. But who am I to judge a goddess? I thought at first that Aphrodite must be very vain, that she must crave people’s compliments the way other people crave food. Sometimes I wondered, though. She was so prickly with anyone who actually got close to her. This business of worship was more complicated than I realized.

When we went to the Mortal Realm, we visited Aphrodite’s temples and inspected them to be sure they keep up her standards. She spoke with the priestesses, questioning them about their work: that they always stand open to aid lovers, that they encourage women to be beautiful, but not too beautiful. One day she told me, that was how I got her attention.

“Do you know why Eros came to you?” she asked. “I sent him. I heard there was a young woman so lovely that mortals were starting to worship her. That was you. So I sent him to smite you.” She watched me closely after she said that. I tried not to react, though in truth I did not know what to feel. I had not realized before, Aphrodite was not just testing her son, she was testing me too. I did not know how to be worthy of him. Did I want to be? Did it matter why he first saw me? Surely what truly mattered were his actions, and what we meant to one another? I was so terribly confused. I wished I could talk to him. And what did she mean that people were worshipping me? I never saw that. 

Besides visiting temples, Aphrodite took me other places. Academies, palaces, markets. Sunny riverbanks, fields of flowers, isolated courtyards. She liked to keep an eye on the romances brewing between young people. After a while, though, we started visiting some very strange places. Lonely fields, blighted by fire and strife, littered with bones and broken weapons. Remote caves. Battlements high above city streets. These were not places I associated with lovers’ trysts. I could not understand it, but I followed her faithfully and assisted as she asked.

One day she spoke of it. “You are wondering why we visit these places of fighting and battle, are you not? You think they are not places where love grows. They are not places of beauty.” She watched me, and I waited. “Normally you would be right. But I am looking for my lover, and these are his places.” It was not like her to share so much at once. I could never forget that she was testing me. I practiced my patience.

“Yes, my lady,” I said. “How can I help?”

From that day, she told me more about what we were doing and where we were going. We were looking for Ares, who was missing. He had not been seen in Olympus for some time and Aphrodite was worried for him, that he might be hurt and unable to return. We looked in all sorts of places, everywhere we could think of. While we looked, I wondered. Was Eros looking for me, right now? Was he worrying for me as Aphrodite worried for Ares? I saw him nearly every day, and yet I did not know what he was thinking. He did not trust the nymph that I was now, and spoke to his mother only in private. Nor did she share those conversations with me.

We spent a lot of time in the Mortal Realm. I saw other women and girls. Some of them had lovers, husbands. Some were happy. Some were not. For many, I could not tell their feelings, but I wondered. Did they know their men as well as they thought? Was there a secret in their lives too? And what would they have done if they were me? Would they have fallen prey to suspicion and fear, as I did?

I thought about my sisters. I wondered if they were well. I wondered now, truly, were they so happy in their marriages? I was starting to doubt it. I was not sure if I dreaded meeting my sisters again, or wished for it. What would I say to them? I thought Aphrodite would smite them if I begged her to. I wondered what smiting looks like.

***

Aphrodite kept me away from other gods, as much as possible. She said nymphs and satyrs and such were safe enough for me to associate with, but gods could be dangerous for one such as me. The only ones I saw often were her and Eros, and the children. I glimpsed some of them from a distance. They were exquisite, every one, but I thought she was likely right: they were dangerous.

One day Aphrodite decided that since we needed to be away in the Mortal Realm for longer than usual, she would put her little dog in a special place where it could be cared for properly. This meant traveling all the way to the Underworld. I was frightened, but also excited. Olympus was such an interesting place, I was eager to see more. Besides, Aphrodite did not think it was frightening, or anything other than ordinary. I was determined not to shame myself by behaving like a child.

When we arrived, though, it seemed I was right to be frightened, and Aphrodite was wrong to be calm. We were approaching the dog facility when Aphrodite spotted a man, and yelled at me to run. He seemed angry, and he was very large, and chasing us. I ran. Aphrodite said that he was Hades, and that she had played a prank on him. I could not understand this. Aphrodite told me that gods were dangerous, and yet she made sport of the scariest one of all? I ran as fast as I could, and was glad when we reached the car. I thought we were safe, but the gods have many tricks.

There was a terrible noise and Hades appeared out of nowhere in the back of the car, all scrunched up and cursing freely. I had never been more frightened in my life, not even when Eros came to take me away, looking like a monster, wearing that hideous helmet. I thought Hades would destroy both of us, for making mock of him and running away. But he did not. All he wanted was to talk to Aphrodite. He was very different from what I expected. He seemed diffident almost, or at least respectful. I watched them from a distance and tried to understand both why she had tricked him, and why she had run. 

When Aphrodite and I were leaving, she told me some of what he said. “He knows what you are,” she said, a warning in her voice. 

“He does? Is he going to kill me? You said it was improper for a mortal to be here! You said you would protect me!” I was panicking.

“He is not going to do anything,” she soothed. “Though I am not sure why. I suppose he likes having a hold over me.”

“Oh.” From her tone, I thought she might be in a talkative mood. “Why did you play a trick on him?” I asked cautiously.

“He insulted me.” She tossed her hair angrily.

“Oh no!” I gasped, making a show of shock. “Why would he do that?”

She smiled in that frightening way she had. “He is in love. Unfortunately, he is too stupid to know it.”

I stayed quiet, contemplating this idea. I cannot understand how anyone can be too stupid to know they are in love.

***

It was a few days later that Aphrodite and I came home from searching all night for Ares in the Mortal Realm. We were both exhausted. We entered the kitchen, and Eros was there, making breakfast for all the little children. He looked so sweet in his apron, with the baby on his back. I ached to hold him. But someone else was there, as well. A young and beautiful goddess, pink and exquisite, tiny and voluptuous. She looked like someone who actually belonged with a love god.

Ludus pulled me away, demanding attention, though I desperately wanted to stay and learn about the newcomer. Soon she left with Eros, and I asked Aphrodite about her. “That was Persephone,” she said, rolling her eyes. “You do not have to worry about her. She is in love with someone else. She and Eros are friends, and he wants to help her. She is probably the best friend you have.” What an odd idea. A friend I did not even know? I wanted more friends.

I waited a few days and asked Aphrodite about the pink goddess again. “I know you said she loves another, but I cannot help worrying. I want to talk to her, and make certain that she does not want Eros,” I explained. Jealousy was something Aphrodite could understand, and I did not lie. I did want to make certain. “Do you think she is dangerous?” I asked.

“She is a goddess, dearheart, what do you think?” Aphrodite answered. “Well, go if you must. Probably she is no more dangerous than I am.” This was not reassuring.

Aphrodite said I needed a reason for visiting, so she wrote a note for me to deliver. She gave me directions. “Be careful, child. Persephone lives with Artemis. That one thinks she is a protector of young girls but honestly she is not very good at it. Remember, you cannot tell them you are mortal.”

***

I knocked on the door and Persephone answered it right away. “Oh, hello!” she looked happy to see me. “Ampelus, right? Aphrodite’s friend?”

It startled me to be described that way. I did not think Aphrodite was my friend. I would not say she wished me ill, but we were not friends. But I was warned, and I had steeled myself to lie to this goddess. “Yes,” I said. “She sent me with a note for you.” 

“Come in. Would you like some tea?” 

I accepted, pleased that she was giving me time to speak to her. She sat me down in a pleasant kitchen, and bustled around making tea and serving cookies. “Have you worked for Aphrodite long?” she asked. 

“Not long,” I replied. “A few months now. And you? Are you perhaps a friend of the family?”

“Well,” she hesitated. “I could not say I am Aphrodite’s friend. But yes, I am friends with Eros.”

“I think it is not easy to be Aphrodite’s friend. She is kind to me, but she does not let me get close.”

Persephone seemed to understand. “I think that is true for many gods. They do not trust easily.”

She startled me. “May I ask, why do you say ‘they’? Are you not a goddess yourself?”

“Oh! Well, yes. I am. But I am very young, and I grew up in the Mortal Realm. Things are different there. Besides my mother, I did not know many gods until recently.”

I smiled. Perhaps Aphrodite was right about Persephone being a friend to me. “I am also young, and from the Mortal Realm.” These things were true, and yet I was also misleading a goddess. My secret made me feel both powerful and guilty.

“How did you come to Olympus?” she asked.

I had long since prepared a story for this. It was even mostly true. “My father picked a husband for me, but he was not a man I wanted. I ran away and ended up here.” Aphrodite had assured me that this was the sort of thing that could happen to a nymph, just as much as to a mortal girl like me. “What about you? You have not been here long either?”

“Only a couple of weeks. I am going to college, and working. My mother did not want to let me go, but eventually she agreed.”

“Did she not want you to marry?” I was surprised. Her mother must be very different from mine.

“Oh no!” she laughed. “Far from it. My mother wants me to be an eternal maiden.” She frowned, just a little. 

“But that is not what you want?” 

“I am not sure. I am trying to figure that out.”

I nodded, understanding. I had things to figure out, too. “Olympus is a strange place to me,” I admitted.

“Yes, it is,” she agreed. “There is so much freedom here. And it is very beautiful, but it can be very scary, too.” 

We finished our tea while we discussed Olympus, and how new and different it was for both of us.

***

Persephone asked me to come over again for an evening meal, and to watch an entertainment. I was glad to agree. I still had some fear that she wanted Eros for herself, but mostly I just liked her.

Aphrodite told me I must bring wine if I was invited to dinner, so I did that. Persephone seemed pleased and surprised. “Oooh, look at that. Fancy stuff!” she grinned, looking at the bottle. “Last time I drank wine I got in big trouble, but I guess it will be okay.”

“Oh, what happened?” I asked, while I helped to set the table.

“Aphrodite played a trick on me,” she confessed. “She made Eros give me a lot of wine, and when I passed out, they put me in the back of a car. I woke up in Hades’s house.”

I stared at her, deeply surprised. “That sounds very frightening! Were you all right?”

“Oh yes!” she smiled. “Hades is much nicer than anyone thinks. He was very kind to me, and drove me home. We are good friends now, and I work for him.”

“Really? That is interesting. I met him once and he was rather scary, but also, I thought that he was only scary when he felt like it. Does that make sense?”

“Yes, that sounds like him.” She seemed a bit dreamy and far-away. She reminded me of how I felt when I thought about Eros, or how Aphrodite looked when she talked about Ares. 

Then suddenly several things made sense. Aphrodite had said she had played a trick on Hades, and that he was in love, and Persephone too. It all fit together.

“What is it like, working in the Underworld?” I asked. We sat down to eat, and Persephone poured the wine.

“My job is very interesting, and I am learning many things. The Underworld is fascinating and I like it very much.” She told me a great deal about what happens to mortal shades after they die. Some of it matched what I had been told as a child, and some of it did not. Much as I wanted to know more, I was more interested in love than in death.

“You said that Eros got you drunk on purpose. How is it that you ended up being friends?”

“Well, the next day he showed up here and apologized. It turns out he did not want to do it, but his mother forced him.”

“That is interesting.” I wondered how Aphrodite did that. “Do you know how she forced him?”

“Well, I do. But it is rather personal, I should not talk about it.” She smiled apologetically. I was disappointed, but also glad that Persephone cared about keeping her friend’s confidence. 

We went on to discuss many things: art and gardens, Olympus and the Mortal Realm, comparing our lives. We enjoyed the wine and food. Later, Artemis came home and the three of us laughed together through a very silly movie. I was very glad to have friends.

***

When Ares returned, things changed. Aphrodite had little time for me anymore, and little need, except to watch the children. They spent most of their time together, whether it was alone in bed or out at parties. When I did see her, she was softer, more inclined to giggle and daydream. I found myself missing my hard-edged, sharp-tongued patroness.

I had a lot of free time on my hands, and had to find something to do. Bored and lonely, one afternoon I went over to Artemis and Persephone's house.

"Perse is not home, sorry," Artemis informed me. “She works crazy long hours now.”

“Oh,” I said. “I should have realized.”

“Not a problem. Can I help you?”

“I do not mean to be a bother. I am just looking for company.”

“I am going out now to meet some people for coffee,” she volunteered. “You can come if you like.”

I was happy to go along. Artemis’s friends were a mixed bunch of nymphs. They occupied a set of tables in a comfortable outdoor coffee shop. We sat with our drinks and they all jumped into a debate about hunting equipment and dogs. I had little to contribute to the conversation, but still I was glad to be there. I took out my pad and pencils and began sketching. I drew the scenes they described: running through fields, chasing deer, eating a meal sitting by a campfire.

“Hey!” said one of the nymphs, noticing my work. “That is really good! You are quite an artist.” Some of the others moved to look at my pad and admire.

“Can you do painting too?” asked the first nymph. “I would love to have that scene for my house.” She pointed to one of my sketches. 

“Yes, I can,” I said. “I would be happy to paint it for you.”

She got all excited. “Can you put me in it, too? I will pay you, of course.”

“Pay me? People pay for art?” I looked at Artemis.

“Of course they do, Ampelus,” she said. “It looks like you have yourself a new business.”

***

I was sitting in the living room one stormy evening, drawing a portrait of Agape while Aphrodite read to Philia and Philautia and the other children played a game on the floor. Ares was busy, so it was a rare family gathering. I was quietly enjoying the peace and company, until the door banged open with a crash. Eros stood there, wide-eyed and panting, dripping with rain. “Psyche?” he cried, staring at me. I dropped my pencil and pad in shock. My mouth dropped open, and I was unable to move. “Psyche, is that really you?” He stepped into the room, slowly, never taking his eyes from mine.

“Eros,” I breathed.

“You are dripping all over the carpet!” Aphrodite shrieked.

Eros ignored her and kept approaching until he crumpled at my feet. “I cannot believe it has been you the whole time. I am so stupid,” he said. 

All the children were watching, rapt, but Aphrodite stomped out of the room. I wondered vaguely if she was angry, but I could not really care. My tears were welling up and spilling down my cheeks.

“Eros, I am so sorry. I would never have hurt you. I let my sisters’ suspicions get to me and I lost my head.”

“I know,” he murmured, taking my hand. “Psyche, it was wrong of me to steal you away like that, away from your family, and keep you isolated. You must have been so lonely and frightened. I should have listened to you better. It was wrong of me not to tell you who I am. I am sorry, too.”

My tears were flowing freely now. He was saying all the things I wanted to hear. Then Aphrodite whirled back into the room, her annoyance obvious in every line of her body. She threw something at Eros and it smacked him in the head. “Dry yourself off, idiot! That rug was expensive!” He took the towel and laughed, wiping it quickly over his face and then stuffing it under his legs. 

He turned back to me. “Will you give me another chance?”

I nodded, thrilled. “Of course I will. If you will do the same for me.”

He scooped me up in his arms and carried me out of the room. As we moved down the hall, I could feel my body tingling, and I could see the purple melting from my skin, going back to my normal color. The children were following after us, laughing, teasing, and cheering. Eros closed his bedroom door behind us, smiled at me, and I smiled back. The children stayed out in the hall for hours, singing and making boisterous noises. We did not mind at all. 

***

Is this what it is like between men and women? Or only with a god? I am curious to know, but really, it does not matter. Eros is the only one I want.


End file.
